When you lose touch with yourself, you lose yourself in the world.
Table of Contents
Do more, be less
Do you sometimes feel a whole day has gone by and you can’t remember any of it?
We consistently try to do so many things in a day and then we end up being depleted and exhausted. Overscheduling puts us in a constant state of stress. We feel stressed all the time because we develop more of the control mindset. Control is rooted in fear. What might happen if we don’t accomplish enough?
We want to do more because it’s expected from us. Doing means producing results. So producing results requires our constant action. Society sees us through our successes. Our desire to reap the fruits of our work creates attachment and expectations. Then our identity and self-worth are defined by our professional achievements. We’re setting ourselves up for disappointment and we become obsessed with performance.
I hope we agree that there is too much doing. GO GO GO! When we live on autopilot, we allow life to jump in and dictate how our day goes for us.
Now the solution wouldn’t be to just stop doing everything but to find balance between being and doing.
"Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished."
How to balance being and doing
Can you really just experience presence when you‘re sitting and doing nothing? Or can you be present while carrying out daily tasks?🤔
You lose yourself in doing with a minimum presence on daily activities. The future becomes more important than the present moment.
So how to keep yourself present and aware in daily activities?
Nothing is worth more than this moment
What do you need to do now? Are you trying just to get to that future moment as soon as possible because you don’t want to be in the present moment. The future moment is simply perfect because your desire is fulfilled and you feel accomplished.
Well there isn’t future because you can’t see it. It’s beyond your reach. It’s just a thought. You have a thought of your future where everything on your to-do list is checked off. Only then you can feel relaxed and satisfied.
Find balance between being and doing by bringing mindfulness into the activities you do. Being mindful isn’t difficult, you just need to remember to do it.
Being and Doing Practice: Give your fullest attention to the doing rather than rushing to get to the end of the process. When you are fully aware of your daily activities you don’t want just to get them done. Stop using daily activities as means to come to the future where you think you should be.
Honor the moment as it is by giving your fullest attention to it. Whatever happens in your day you choose to infuse it with your presence. So doing becomes secondary to being.
Be more, do less
Enjoying the steps of life rather than racing through them in order to just get to the next moment.
When you start being more present in everyday life, your real qualities come forward. I’m talking about being a humble, generous, and kind human being.
Being and Doing Practice: Write down what you’re planning to do tomorrow. Think carefully about your priorities. Do you really need to get them all done tomorrow? Now, choose 2 things to leave out.
Spend that time with yourself or looking through the window, or watching your kids play, walk in the nature, practice meditation…Be where you are. Happy in the moment. That’s enough.
You don't need to prove yourself through your actions!
One activity at the time
Doing one thing at the time is the key to practicing presence in any daily activity. The quality of doing changes.
When you pick one thing at a time and concentrate on it, you become more productive, creative and intentional which results in a high quality product.
It’s easy to get caught up juggling few things at the time. We find a lot of pride in being multitaskers and more efficient. People even brag about how they have no time to get enough sleep or how they skip meals because they’re so busy. Then they complain about how tired and overwhelmed they feel.
Being and Doing Practice: Make a list of your daily routines. Choose one and bring more focus every time you perform it by looking for something new in it. Give your full attention to every step of the way.
For example, when cooking a dish focus on each task letting yourself be entertained by the process. Notice colours, shapes, texture and smell of the spices you’re using. The key is to use your senses to ground you in the moment.
When your partner is telling you about his day, be 100% with him. Don’t think about something else or try to fix anything. Listen!
Create rituals
To stay present in the midst of your activities, create rituals around them. Rituals will bring more attention to the task so you experience things more fully. Your mind will be more prepared for the work. Also they will help you smoothly transition between activities.
Being and Doing Practice: Burning an incense stick could prepare you for meditation practice. Putting on an apron and playing your favourite songs could prepare you for mindful cooking.
It’s not about getting things done, checking off one more task on your to-do list, being always on the go. It’s about staying connected to yourself and enjoying the journey!
It’s important to focus on “being” since we have been already doing too much. It is the desire of producing more results that’s making a mess of our lives.